I wish I could remember the taste of a meal long after I have eaten it, I wish I could see my partners face long after they have left, I wish I could feel my friends hug as she embraced me long after she had let go, I wish I could picture the one time my Mother said I love you long after she is gone, I wish I was so in tune with life, so aware, so enlightened that every moment was my greatest and I could feel it, taste it, and truly live it.

I do not want to wait until someone tells me there are no more moments left I do not want to feel cheated because a Higher Power took my moments away. I want to be grateful a Higher Power gave me the moment to begin with.

As youth slips away and it will slowly I want to be able to look in the mirror and see the happiness of a life lived with depth and passion etched in my face. I want to be able to feel the touch of my lovers hand as it brushed away my tears not just remember it. But unless I am truly aware truly in the moment at the time allowing myself to feel, letting go of expectations, letting go of the need to hold something back, unless that happens all I will have is a vague memory. I want more I want an imprint so strong I can carry it with me and feel it when the moments are at an end.

My wish for you is that you may look in the mirror of self reflection long before youth has disappeared. I hope you will realize life doesn’t need to be filled up with things rather it needs to be soaked up for all it has to offer right now at this very moment. My wish for you is that you may experienced even for a second a state of total being when everything falls away and time stands still and you can taste the air you breath, feel the earth pulsate beneath your feet and hear the whisper of the Angels.

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What is forgiveness?

“Forgiveness is something virtually all Americans aspire to – 94% surveyed in a nationwide Gallup poll said it was important to forgive-in the same survey; only 48% said they usually tried to forgive others.”

I don’t think a single person can escape life without experiencing hurt by another person. Maybe the hurt is angry words spoken during an argument or a friend who surprises you with betrayal. Perhaps the pain comes from emotional neglect, infidelity, divorce or even sexual and physical abuse. Sometimes the hurt is a one time event. Other times the pain continues for a long time.

Forgiveness is a necessary step to healing from pain. It is a choice to extend mercy to the person who hurt you. Sometimes forgiveness allows you to move forward with the other person and experience a new relationship. Other times, reconciliation is not possible. In this case, forgiveness is more for you and your own personal growth.

Why forgive?

First and foremost, God commands us to forgive. In Mark 11:25-26, it says “And when you stand in praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father who is in heaven forgive your sins.”

You might be saying, “But you don’t understand what’s been done to me.” And you’re right; I don’t know all the hurts you’ve endured. However, I know from experience that it pays to forgive. Forgiveness is a sign of strength – not weakness. It is the strong who can put aside the past and let go of anger and resentment. My mom comes from a large family, with seven brothers and sisters. There has been a lot of sibling rivalry, and I’m always amazed at the amount of resentment that still remains in the family today.

Anger and resentment drains your energy, and keeps you imprisoned by your past. By choosing to let go of your hurt and anger, you give yourself the freedom to fully experience joy in life. Anger builds inside us, so by letting go, you improve your ability to control your anger. We’ve all seen the person who blows up at the smallest incident. It is the accumulation of built up anger that is unreleased that causes this explosion. So many diseases, like heart disease and cancer, can be triggered by unresolved resentment. By choosing to forgive, you can dramatically improve your emotional and physical health.

Without forgiveness, you cannot move forward in your own personal and relational growth.

What forgiveness is not?

Forgiveness does not mean you allow people to treat you badly. It does not mean you ignore the wrongdoings. It means you accept that the person has made a mistake, and you are choosing to grant them mercy. When you forgive someone, you won’t necessarily forget the hurt. I will always remember the pain I felt when my mom disowned me, but I do not dwell on it, and I do not let it interfere with the quality of our relationship today. I have allowed myself to heal and move on. Forgiveness does not mean you are condoning or excusing the person’s behavior. And it doesn’t mean you have to trust that person again. Some acts, like physical and sexual abuse, require that you limit your trust or at least test the trust with the person who hurt you. Remember, forgiveness is more for you than the other person.

The process of forgiving

So you’ve thought about it and you’re ready to forgive. You’re tired of holding on to old pain and you’ve decided it’s time to let go and move on. What do you do? First, you must face and release the anger that you feel. On the surface of the hurt is anger and you need to break away that layer first. Underneath the anger is the pain and hurt that you must grieve. There are many ways to release anger and hurt. You can talk about it with trusted people. You can spend time journaling. You can pray about it and ask God to take away that pain and resentment. You can express your feelings to the person who hurt you, provided that it’s possible to have a healthy conversation where both you and the other person speak and listen in respectful ways.

One of the best and most cleansing ways to release your negative feelings is to write a letter to your perpetrator. In this letter, you pour out every emotion you feel. You tell them everything that hurt you and everything they did to make you angry. Do not hold anything back. Allow yourself to really feel the anger and cry the tears by reading it out loud to yourself. When you are done, burn or bury the letter as a symbol that you are ready to move on. DO NOT give the letter to the person. This letter is for you and you only.

After processing all your emotions, you are ready to make the choice to forgive. It is a choice that requires compassion, understanding and an open and loving heart. When my mother and I first reconciled, we talked about our feelings. Sometimes we even fought because the pain was still fresh. But we listened to one another and we tried to get inside each other’s shoes. It wasn’t easy, but today, even though I don’t agree with some of my mother’s beliefs, I have compassion and understanding for who she is and why she made the choice she did. I love her regardless of our differences.

Each of us makes mistakes in life. At one time or another (probably more than one time), we will hurt another person. Maybe it will be an accident, or perhaps it will be a purposeful reaction to someone hurting you. When this does happen, do you want to be forgiven? Do you want another chance to make amends? Most people don’t mean to hurt us – they are dealing with their own pain and unresolved resentment. It’s unfortunate that we take it out on our loved ones, but until we break the cycle, it will continue to happen.

Are you ready to break the cycle and do your part to forgive?

Author Bio
Lori Radun, CEC is a certified life coach, speaker and author for moms. To receive her FREE newsletter and the special report, “155 Things Moms Can Do to Raise Great Children”, visit her website at www.true2youlifecoaching.com

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Let us explore this further.

A handicap need not be a reason for failure. On the contrary, a handicap can be a reason for success. People with a handicap always have an offsetting strength that allows them to overcome problems better than others.

A person with a handicap has one obsession – to lead a normal life. Depending on the handicap, a person would prefer to be as independent as possible. So he struggles and finds ways to overcome his impediment. When he is able to achieve his goal, this raises his self-esteem. In turn, he inspires others.

Everybody has handicaps in varying forms and degree. That is why; it requires effort and determination to overcome them. Handicaps can either be physical, financial, or emotional. And they can either be real or imagined.

Whenever we look at a handicap, we almost always look on the negative side only. It’s about time we take a look at the positive side of it. The positive side may be the difficult side, but it’s the one worth looking into. It’s the side that is going to lead us to excel in life.

If you think your handicap is physical, like having a weak body, you can counteract this through proper diet and training exercises. As long as the physical parts of your body are intact and mobile, there’s no reason why you cannot make it strong and useful. Why? Even those without a leg (for example) can be made to walk or run normally. With the advancement of science, artificial legs can help a handicap function with great mobility.

It your handicap is financial, then the more reason you have to rise above your present status. And if your financial status limits your educational attainment to improve your life, the school is not the only place to learn. Certainly, there are help centers to get you started even from zero level. Once you are initially warmed up with the basics of an education, the rest is up to you. Make use of libraries. Once you are educationally equipped, use your brain and come up with creative ideas to improve your life.

If you are emotionally disturbed with negative thoughts, it is like you are sitting on a chair with wobbling legs. Try sitting on a chair with sturdy legs; meaning, look at the bright, positive side of life. Put aside negativity and start thinking positively. The only one who can stop you is yourself.

If your handicap is a combination of any of the physical, financial, or emotional type, congratulations. You should strive more to overcome them, because a double layer of perseverance results to more than double the achievement. Where the odds are greater, the prize gets much bigger. After all the efforts you have exerted, the prize of success shall be a well-deserved one.

So what’s your excuse for not being successful?

Author Bio
David Neese is a real estate investor, hard money lender, small business owner, ecommerce marketer, writer, motivator, father and athlete. David offers a free Ecourse on quick start strategies for getting started in real estate investing that is delivered via email and tele-clinic at: www.freerealestateinvestingcourses.com and you can find more information about David at: www.digitalsuccesscoach.com.

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The feelings of hopelessness can be devastating. They can make you do things you wouldn’t normally do and think things you wouldn’t normally think. However, in those moments when the feelings attack you, normal no longer exists. There is only the fight to get through those intense feelings or the fatigue of just finally wanting to succumb to them.

I can so clearly appreciate these feelings. In fact, I know these feelings first hand. I am a survivor of hopelessness. And I choose the word survivor intentionally.

First, I believe that people who prevail in extreme situations are not victims. Victims don’t make it. A victim of a murder is dead. A survivor is someone who says, “I am not done. I am still here and the power is mine to reclaim.”

Second, I chose the word survivor because there were many times, when I really was just as happy, if not happier, with the thought of checking out of this world and calling it done. In my over-worked and over-achieving mind it seemed to make sense that, if I wasn’t finding a purpose and had no happiness, what was the point in pushing through all this pain and struggle and fear?

The amazing thing is that I am still here. I discovered the answers that I so desperately needed, and now I want to share those answers with others who also know there is so much more than that what you may be experiencing.

Although I don’t know you personally, I do know this. Up to this point, you have pushed through too. Regardless of the strength and will it has taken to do so, you have not given up. And, the even more amazing thing I know is that you are now taking an active role in creating a different future than you have experienced in the past. You are doing that by reading this article. The only way to create something different from what you have already experienced is to add new information, new tools and new resources to your life.

What I discovered that changed my life, and will change yours too, is that without tools, humans would stop growing and evolving. There is no world, as you and I know it, without the tools we use to live on a daily basis. If you think about it then, it makes perfect sense that being the creator of an amazing, joyous, productive and fulfilling life also requires the proper tools. You cannot do this alone. You aren’t supposed to do it alone! And what is so exciting is that — even though you have been struggling and pushing and scraping by without all the tools — you are still here and still making it. Think of what is going to be possible when you do have the proper tools. You won’t believe how much more fun this thing called life can be!

The tools that I teach are the tools that I discovered, modified and combined to deal with my own dire need to find the missing joy and purpose I knew was possible. I knew there had to be a better way than constant struggle.

Tools are what set humans free. Through the use of tools, you can write, cook, create music, build homes, drive, fly and achieve feats never before thought possible. Tools are what allow humans to be more than they could otherwise be. Even research into our animal kingdom shows the use of tools is prevalent for daily survival.

It only makes sense that in order to create a life that you most desire, you must have knowledge and access to the tools of creating and manifesting. Through extensive research and trial and error on my own journey, the following combination of tools is what I found to be the key to living and creating the life you desire.

First, the foundation of creating is based on understanding the general principles of how the world works. The Universal Laws provide this foundation from a spiritual and scientific combined perspective. There are seven universal laws with one overriding law that governs every experience you have. The overriding law is based on Quantum Physics, and is says that everything is made of energy. Everything. From the chair you sit in to the thought you have about the chair to the feelings you get when you sit in the chair. All physical and non-physical “things” are simply varying speeds of energy in varying forms creating the world in which you and I live. By understanding and applying each universal law, you open your mind up to the multiple options for what is actually possible.

For example, if you were to fly a plane, but you had no understanding of the laws of gravity and aerodynamics, flying the plane would, in theory, still be possible. You could get behind the controls and hit the gas. However, you would most likely not have a pleasant or safe flight. You certainly wouldn’t experience the joy and ease of flying and the truly amazing experience you could have if you had the proper tools and knowledge to assist in that endeavor.

Closely related to the foundational tool of the Universal Laws is the Law of Attraction. The Law of Attraction applies the theory of all “things” being made of energy and explains how creating and manifesting is based on focusing and attracting. This law states that whatever you place your energy and focus on is what you attract back to you – wanted or unwanted. This means that by learning to focus on what you do want versus what you don’t want, you have access to attracting every desire you articulate. For example, if you desire to have a safe trip home. You must focus your energy on the safe trip as opposed to focusing on not having an accident. When you focus on not having something, you are actually still putting your focus on that thing you don’t want – in this example the accident.

The challenge with this tool is that is requires the use of three other imperative tools in order for it to work with 100% success. Many people have been frustrated with the Law of Attraction not working, thinking it is flawed. However, I found that it is not the law that is flawed, but the application of the law without the other tools. Just like a hammer is an amazing tool for building, but only if it is combined with a nail. Without the nail, the hammer is extremely limited in its full capacity. The same is true for the nail! Learning and knowing the Law of Attraction is imperative to being a master creator of your life.

One of the tools required to apply the Law of Attraction is the tool of self-awareness. This is a tool that is often under appreciated and taken for granted. Truly understanding where you are right now in your life, why you are there and, most importantly, how you got there is imperative to knowing where you want to go, why and how you plan to get there. The tool of truly understanding yourself is not always as easy as it appears. This is why there are multiple tools for getting a closer look at who you really are. These tools include the 4-eVer evolving! Life Assessment, the Gallup Poll’s StrengthFinder^TM and delving into your past to discover passions, patterns and themes. Without knowing where you are starting, you cannot know in which direction you need to go to get to your destination. You also may not truly understand your destination. When you know where you are starting, what is pulling you forward and exactly where you want to go, the plan for that journey naturally unfolds before you. You cannot create and manifest without an articulated plan.

One of the most important tools needed to create your plan is the Nine Environments of Holistic Living. Your life does not only consist of one area in which you create your experiences from. There are multiple areas of importance that, at varying times, get more or less focus. By using the Nine Environments of Holistic Living, you can break down your life into manageable segments. When you start articulating your goals and desires in each of the separate areas, you quickly find where there may be conflicting intentions occurring. And this is where so much of the hopelessness and frustration is caused.

Conflicting intentions are two desires that, if realized, actually cancel each other out. If you have conflicting intentions that you are not aware of, you often end up not creating either one, or you get a very watered-down version of one or the other. The worst thing that can happen is that you get the opposite of what you intended for both desires creating havoc and chaos in your life.

The best tool I have found to work with the Nine Environments of Holistic Living is Neuro-Linguistic Programming – otherwise known as NLP. NLP is an advanced form of communication that not only improves communication between people, but also opens up communication with all the parts of your subconscious mind. NLP is a tool that allows you to go beyond your conscious into your subconscious mind, where your behaviors and beliefs are formed. It takes you to the source. And, it is only at the source that anything can be affected and changed for long-term growth and evolution. NLP provides multiple exercises and techniques that allow you to determine exactly what is happening within all the various parts of you. Without an understanding of the largest segment of your mind, reported to make up 88%, you cannot possible focus on the destination you most want to manifest. Without proper focus, you attract more of what you don’t want, and forgo creating and manifesting what you do want.

The last tool I created to pull everything together. The Process of Deliberate Creation is a daily tool that uses the information uncovered and discovered in creating your plan to assist in applying the proper focus needed on a daily basis. If you are not creating deliberately, it is too easy to fall into default creating. Default creating is not knowing what you desire in each area of your life. It is not knowing what conflicting intentions may be sabotaging your progress and success and producing hopelessness and sadness. Default creating is not using the Universal Laws to assist in reframing what you see and ultimately what you experience.

Deliberate creation is about combining all of these tools and giving yourself the gift of hope; giving yourself the gift of living the life you came here to live. Deliberate creation is about being a survivor without the struggle, sadness and hopelessness. It is about immediately knowing how to shift every situation and challenge to propel you forward. It is about shifting your mindset to see the possibilities instead of the blocks. It is about having the proper tools to create and manifest for building the life of your dreams, painting the masterpiece of your imagination and making music that fills your soul.

Creating and manifesting is about becoming aware of the tools, which you have done in this article, and learning how to use those tools to begin living your life as a survivor of hopelessness.

I did it and I know, with the combination of these tools, you can too!

Author Bio
Melissa Jean Quiter is an inspirational life and business strategist with Provocative Communications. She is the author of the 4-phase, life and business-changing program, “Being Spiritual Doesn’t Mean Being Poor! How to remove what blocks you from making money & creating happiness,” based on the Law of Attraction and the three required elements (the universal laws, Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the Nine Environments of Holistic Living) to ensure your success 100% of the time. To get started, visit: www.ProvocativeCommunications.com/takingcontrol.html. Melissa also teaches a simple, yet profound, daily process for deliberately creating your life in her book, “My cat made me a millionaire (and how yours can too!),” available here: www.ProvocativeCommunications.com/cat.html . E-mail: Quiter@Texas.net or call: [512] 341-0556.

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